Alexander, my little love
Amelia Ruth, my bright ray of hope
Ella Celeste, my pillar of faithBeing a mother is amazing, overwhelming, exhausting, and absolutely the most wonderful thing I'll ever do. I like to write these posts when my children are sleeping so I feel fondly for them, verses during the day when I'm about to pull my hair out. But we love those we serve, and in no case is that more evident than in the role of a mother. It was just last Christmas that I was reading one of my favorite children's books to my girls, "Little Luv Angel," when I received personal revelation about our family.
Little Luv Angel is the sweetest story of three angels in heaven who are the best of friends, a little girl with brown hair named Faith, her sister with blond hair named Hope, and a little boy with a great big heart, Little Luv. The three are inseparable in Heaven, until one by one it is their turn to be born on earth. Little Luv is devastated when both of his friends leave him, and he decides to run away from Heaven to go to earth to find them. On his journey he encounters the moon and learns the earth is where Heavenly Father will send his own baby boy to be born. It is on the moon that Little Luv is found by his guardian angel and taken to earth too to meet his mother just as his friends have already done. So in the end, Faith, Hope, and Little Luv, three siblings, are at the birth of Christ, presenting their gifts to the child.
This book is such a touching little story, and I almost cry every time I read it. But this last December when I was reading it to the girls I had the distinct impression that this was a similitude of my little family. I have my little Faith, my Ella Celeste, so strong and sure. She asks to say a prayer when she's scared or afraid at night, and she is the first to ask for a blessing when she is not feeling well. I'm amazed at her faith, and Shaun and I often talk about her inquisitive nature and her willingness to believe the things she is taught. And then we have our bright ray of Hope, Amelia Ruth. She has been a source of peace and hope since even before she was born. I sensed her little spirit and knew she would bring me hope. She was born when we were really struggling with career choices and she truly was the only thing that kept me going some days. Her big bright eyes and her cheery disposition bring all of us joy. It's interesting but after her baby blessing I talked about how Shaun said she would be a source of hope for our entire family. I was just reading my blog post about that the other day and literally got chills. It was another witness to me that my impressions back in December were indeed from the Lord and not my own imagination. So when I was reading to the girls, I almost knew that we would have a little boy next, and he would be full of love. I didn't even know yet that I was pregnant and wouldn't find out for a couple of weeks. When we found out, I had a dream of a little boy with sandy brown hair and hazel eyes (he was about 18 months old in my dream). I kept dismissing these dreams and promptings because I was concerned they may be more of my own desires than actual confirmations from the Lord, but when we had the ultrasound and found out we were having a baby boy, I knew I should never have doubted those feelings. And just like with Amelia, I could sense his little spirit. I knew he would be mellow and loving. Thus far this has proven to be 100% accurate. He is truly our little Luv! And I think that is also my witness that our family is complete, although there's a part of me that's not ready to say that with finality. Who knows, maybe I'll dream about another little girl or boy in a couple of years and change my mind, but I really think the Lord was telling me that evening while I was reading to the girls that this is my special little family. These precious little angels were in heaven waiting to come to our home, and they were close to one another. I really and truly sense that, and know it to be true. I love them so much, and I love that as their mother I can sense their little spirits- I could sense their spirits before they were even with us. I love them for all of their qualities. Ella is a leader, she is strong but amazingly tender too. She is going to do amazing things. I love talking with her and hearing her ideas. She's so articulate and smart, full of energy and life. Amelia is delightful! Her personality is like a magnet for people. She is fun loving and happy. She is a source of true joy. And already in his short six weeks with us Alex is a bundle of love. I catch myself frequently calling him my little love. He is adorable and mellow and when he smiles (he has just started doing that) there's nothing on this earth that could melt my heart more. Truly, these are our three angels, and it's important for me to remember they came to us from Heaven. It's easy to sense that when they are little like Alex, but as they get bigger you can forget. They are precious spirit children of our Heavenly Father, entrusted to our care during this mortal journey. That is an awesome responsibility, and I am privileged to have the calling of mother. I only hope and pray I can do all within my power to teach them of the love their Heavenly Father has for them. I am touched that the Lord allows me little insights into eternity as I receive revelation regarding my family. I am grateful to know and feel the importance of personal revelation in my life. I'm sure I could be doing a lot more to understand and gain insight into eternal matters, but those times that I do receive that insight I am grateful for. I am grateful the Lord loves me enough to hear my prayers and answer them, and sometimes answer me when I'm not even asking the question. I am so very grateful for my children, who are all blessed with various gifts, but in them I sense the Christlike qualities of Faith, Hope, and Love. They are amazing!
