15 down, 30 to go!

January never really inspires me to wax profound and write prolific posts of great importance, mostly because I'm simply trying to endure January. But alas, it will shorty come to an end. Not too much to report these days. We haven't had much in the way of snow, we haven't had much in the way of new news as far as jobs go. So since the weather and the people processing clearances aren't really working in my favor, I've focused my efforts on elements I can control. I started meeting with a nutritionist and am bound and determined to make 2012 the year I get back in control of my body. I was feeling a bit hopeless last year. I'd try to count calories, do weight watchers, all with little to no success. So I have found new hope in trying to adopt a lifestyle and way of eating I can maintain my entire life. For the first several weeks they've had me cut out carbs, and now we're slowly adding fruit and whole grains, but I'm proud to report I've lost 15 pounds. I'm a third of the way there! 30 still to go, but like I said, I have renewed hope that I will get there, hopefully by Spring/Summer time, I'll be excited to go swim suit shopping (or more excited than I've been in years at least). I know I'll never be model thin, but I will be where I feel healthy, and that is so important to me.

That's pretty much it. Going to the gym on a routine basis and focusing on healthy eating is my strategy for combatting the winter blues and blahs. But when I'm not focused on that, I'm just trying to enjoy my beautiful girls and not feel so discouraged about the fact that we've been waiting for Shaun's job to start now for 18 MONTHS! I mean, seriously! Nothing makes you feel like you're of no importance than to feel forgotten. But if you don't know someone that can pull some strings, you get put on the bottom of a very long paper pile (or that's what we assume). Shaun's such a good guy, and he really wants to get started. We pursue other options only to meet dead ends or never hear back. It's all pretty discouraging, but at least we're in good health, and we live relatively comfortably. I still long for a home of my own, but with our current income we can't afford much of anything. I know the Lord loves us, for some reason He has chosen this trial for us, but I remind myself of all I have to be grateful for, and most days it's not so bad. I so wish for Shaun that things can get started. Please continue to pray for us. Maybe it will come around in time for his 30th birthday. That would be the best gift we could ever receive!

The Choice to be Grateful

Every Christmas Eve, I try to think about something I'd like to work on in the coming year to better myself. I try to get Shaun to do it too, and we write these goals down and put them in a simple box under the tree. They are the gifts we hope to bring to the Savior, whether it be more faith, patience, charity, less pride, the list can be endless. This past year I've tried to focus on gratitude. I've found it very easy to slip into the "whoa is me" mentality, that it takes real effort to remember gratitude. As I've mentioned in posts throughout the year, a change in perspective can make all the difference. This year, while it has been extremely challenging in many ways, it has also been one of great growth. I'm so grateful that I've been able to focus on gratitude. I knew I was on to something when this month'sFirst Presidency message in the Ensign was title, "The Choice to be Grateful." I have my moments when I admit I fall short and begin to complain and worry. I often have to remind myself that I may not be where I thought I'd be, but I'm doing just fine nonetheless. We have our health, our girls are healthy, our home is comfortable, my job is good, and we have the hope the future brings. We really are quite fortunate.

Looking to the future, I'd like to continue and renew this focus to choose to be grateful. Along with that, I'd like to be more diligent in many ways. So I'm adding diligence to the list of things to bring to my Savior. I know if I can humbly lay my heart upon his alter, He can make weak things strong. He can make me the person that I can only hope to be. I'm grateful for His love, for his mercy, for His saving grace. I'm grateful that he knows me personally, and that I can talk to him as a friend. I'm grateful He is my advocate with the Father. I'm grateful for his humble birth, His Atonement, His perfect example! I know it is only through Him I may be made strong.

Santa Baby~ Christmas 2011

Calderwood Family photo, Christmas morning

2011

Church was at 9 on Christmas morning, making the whole gift opening thing a bit tricky, but we just had the girls see their big Santa gift (unwrapped and waiting by the tree), and then we held off on the rest until after church and a short nap for Amelia.

Amelia enjoyed Christmas but she didn't quite get what was going on. She was happy all the same. She got big jumbo legos as she loves putting things together and especially loves pulling the blocks in and out of the bag.

Shaun got a motorcycle, a sweater, and a beautiful scrapbook of his mission memories that his sister put together. Must have taken her a ton of time, and it was absolutely beautiful! I swear the Calderwood family has more talent in their little pinkies than I do in my whole body.

Amelia got a kitty that purrs from Grandma and Grandpa. She loved it and giggled every time it moved or made noise.

Steph gave me a beautiful scarf!

Ella got more fun Repunzel pieces from Grandma and Grandpa C.

Ella and Amelia both got beautiful hair bows, but Amelia was more interested in the m&m's in her stocking.

Ella and Amelia both got poodle purses from their great grandma and grandpa Calderwood.

See, I told you Shaun got a motorcycle:-) And that is the ONLY motorcycle I will get for him.

Ella got the big tower from Santa, and the singing and glowing Repunzel doll to go with it. She said Santa did a pretty good job this year. Her favorite presents ever!

So it was a fun and whimsical Christmas day!

We enjoyed talking with family and having nana and papa there to open gifts. And I especially enjoyed getting to go to Church Christmas morning and focus on the true meaning of Christmas, surrounded by family and friends. The gift of our Savior's birth, life, infinite atonement, and resurrection mean more to me than anything. I'm so grateful that because of his humble birth and life to follow, I can be with my family eternally. I'm grateful I can repent, I'm grateful I can start again and have a re-birth so to speak every time I partake of the sacrament. I'm grateful for new beginnings, excited for the New Year ahead of us and all it will bring.

Christmas Eve

We had one of the best Christmas Eves to date in my book. My sister is here with her wonderful family so our families spent the day together and then had a white elephant chocolate exchange, followed by a delicious ham dinner, and then a visit to the temple to see the lights.

Amelia and Shaun enjoying the last rays of sunlight on Christmas Eve

My little pumpkin. Oooh I love those squishy cheeks. So kissable!

The Millers as dusk comes upon the temple grounds.

Our little family enjoying the lights and festivities

Shaun and I have been able to visit the Temple every Christmas Eve since we've been married unless we were traveling. I think this year made six out of eight. It's such a wonderful way to spend the evening, focused on the true meaning of Christmas and visiting our Savior's Holy House.

Inside the visitor's center Nana enjoys her grandchildren

In keeping with Williams tradition, my parents gave their presents to the girls Christmas Eve. Nana and Papa bought Ella a beautiful doll. Ella was in love. She named her Aurora and has been joined at the hip with her ever since.

They got Amelia a horse. She is also quite smitten.

The ladies taking a break from ham dinner prep for a photo op

Sarah and Katie played carols on the piano while we prepared

Shaun gave Nathan a hard time

And the cousins enjoyed many good times cuddling, kissing, and teasing.

Lacy and Amelia sharing a moment

The best part of the day was really just being together as family. Seeing my girls enjoy their cousins and laugh with them was the best gift for me. I only wish we could have the rest of our family with us as well. We miss Shaun's family so much with them being so far away, and my other sister and brother and their families were missed too. Hopefully 2012 will allow for visiting with them at some point. But we are truly grateful for a most wonderful

Christmas Eve!

Church Christmas Party

My girls had a BLAST at our church Christmas Party last weekend!

It was casual dinner/entertainment with some of the church families performing various Christmas songs, some fun and some spiritual. Whenever a fun song came up, Ella was right up there dancing. She got up and river danced with a family during their performance of, "It's Christmas in Killarney." I don't even know where she picked up these moves, but below is a shot of her in action. She loves performing! My little ham.

She also enjoyed all of the chocolate and treats she get could get her hands on. I really tried to monitor her sweet intake, but she is quick I tell you.

Amelia also enjoyed the performances. She was very excited to sit up front with the older girls. I love this photo of her... so precious!

Amelia and daddy having a grand ole time, even if it looks like Amelia's a bit spacey.

I love having a ward family to look forward to spending holiday celebrations with. The friendships I have through the gospel (current and past) make my life feel richly blessed.

Deck the Halls!

We've been busy getting ready for Christmas at the Calderwood home.

Shaun won the light battle again so colored lights it is!

And yes, that is our nativity in the fireplace. Seemed like a good focal point.

I love the ambiance of Christmas!

Our foyer. Shaun's says it looks like the trees are on fire. Don't be worried. They are just "glowing" as all things should at Christmas time.

Happy Birthday Nana and visits with Santa

Tonight we celebrated Nana's "29th" birthday with dinner and cake... Nana's favorite, German Chocolate. Ella was very excited to give Nana her birthday present and waited patiently all weekend to give it to her today. Christmas is going to be fun.

And speaking of Christmas, Ella got to visit the big man this weekend. We took the girls to Gum Drop Square in Old Town where Ella got to sit with Santa and choose two little gifts for us (though she said they were actually for her). Amelia didn't go for the big man in red. She took one look at him and started crying. Ella was very excited but when she actually got on his lap she froze. She was a bit intimidated I think after all our talk of him knowing if she's been naughty or nice. She told him she wants the Repunzel that sings and glows. Very exciting! It's a good thing Santa went shopping at Amazon.com and took care of all these orders right away:) We are enjoying the Christmas Season and it's especially fun to feel the magic of Christmas through the eyes of a child. The littlest things hold such joy and excitement... from nana's nutcrackers and ornaments, to the lights on the tree that Amelia keeps trying to pull off. The girls are enjoying the Season which means I am enjoying the Season! So Happy Holiday Season to all of you! I hope you are enjoying the wonder and excitement this time of year brings!

The girls are having fun together these days when Ella's not getting mad at her sister for trying to take her toys.

Ella was a little less intimidated with Nana's fake Santa. She warmed right up to him and gave him hugs and kisses. Amelia has been loving on him all week too.

Amelia helped Nana celebrate with lots of loves and drooly kisses.